The Old Rose and Crown General Store: Cheyenne Frontier Days: Danny Gokey and Sugarland

Danny Gokey was the one act I was not invested in all week, and for fairly good reason. His music is middle of the road, fun but nothing special, and the man himself just bothers me. He looked like a sleazebag, somehow, and he spent way too much time singing to the cameras instead of us. Hi, yeah, I know you were on American Idol and I guess there I can understand doing that because most of the people watching are at home. But we're, like, right in front of you. Right here. Stop it.

The Gokester. Goka Cola. Diet Goke. Hokey Gokey. Gokerama. Asshole.

You can't see it here, but not only is his shirt unbuttoned that low, he's wearing a gold chain. It's not my fault he decided to dress like sleaze, okay?

Sugarland was much more fun. First off, my dad and Kim would both seriously consider murdering a basketful of kittens to get backstage passes, so they were both super excited. Second, as I said, my boss' husband Denny got us these amazing seats, and the best were for Sugarland: front row of the first balcony. Sugarland used to be a bigger band, but now it's pretty much Jennifer Nettles and Kristian "There Is No Way I Don't Spend Half My Life Telling People My Name Starts With a 'K'" Bush. And I'm pretty sure once Jennifer figures out she doesn't exactly need an entire other person to play guitar while she sings, Kristian is going to be looking for a new gig.

Our amazing seats. No kittens were harmed.

Kristian is either at this angle because he's a) afraid Jennifer is going to smack him one as she dances around in her very unique style or b) is just straight afraid of Jennifer smacking him. "You're still here!?" *SMACK*

"I'm Mister Heat Miser, I'm Mister Sun..."

Jennifer realizes how many people actually need to be in this band.

"No, see! I play guitar! Look at me play! You need me! Please, I have debts! THEY'RE GONNA BREAK MY THUMBS."

OH SHIT.

"That's right, Kristian. What now?"

Boyfriend better watch his back, is all I'm saying. He also should stop getting off stage and giving other people his guitar, because then he is OFF STAGE and SANS guitar, and I'm just saying, *that's* when Jennifer is going to make her move.

This picture is as blurry as Billy Joel's eyesight around two in the morning, but you can still get the drift of it: Jennifer, singing, playing guitar, while Kristian stands there. If there aren't klaxons going off in the back of his mind then he is one dumb cowboy (kowboy?).